Meghan Markle Opens Up About Kate Middleton Making Her Cry and What Their Relationship Is Really Like

The British tabloids loved to pit Kate Middleton and Meghan Markle against each other, creating a false narrative that the two women were feuding. But in her interview with Oprah, Meghan spoke candidly about what her relationship with the Duchess of Cambridge and the false tabloid story that Meghan made Kate cry before her royal wedding. The truth is, Kate made her cry.

Meghan said, “The narrative with Kate, which didn’t happen, was really, really difficult and something that I think, that’s when everything changed, really.”

“No. [I didn’t make Kate cry],” she said. “No, no, the reverse happened. And I don’t say that to be disparaging to anyone, because it was a really hard week of the wedding, and she was upset about something, but she owned it, and she apologized, and she brought me flowers and a note apologizing and she did what I would do if I knew that I hurt someone. To just take accountability for it.

“What was shocking was, what was that, six, seven months after our wedding, the reverse of that would be out in the world [the story suggesting Meghan made Kate cry]. I would’ve never wanted that to come out about her ever even though it had happened. I protected that from ever being out in the world. A few days before the wedding, she was upset about something pertaining—yes, the issue was correct about flower girl dresses, and it made me cry and it really hurt my feelings, and I thought in the context of everything else that was going on in those days leading to the wedding that it didn’t make sense to not be just doing what everyone else was doing, which was try to be supportive, knowing what was going on with my dad and whatnot.

“There wasn’t a confrontation, and I actually think it’s…I don’t think it’s fair to her to get into the details of that because she apologized and I’ve forgiven her,” Meghan continued. “What was hard to get over was being blamed for something that not only I didn’t do but that happened to me and the people that were a part of my wedding going to my comms team, saying, I know this didn’t happen. I don’t have to tell them what actually happened, but i can at least go on the record saying, ‘She didn’t make her cry.’ Everyone in the institution knew it wasn’t true. I’m not sharing that piece about Kate in any way to be disparaging to her. I think it’s really important for people to understand the truth, but also I think a lot of it that was fed into by the media. Look, I would hope that she wouldve wanted that corrected. And maybe in the same way that the Palace wouldn’t let anybody else negate it, they wouldn’t let her, because she’s a good person, and I think so much of what I have seen play out was this idea of polarity where if you love me you don’t have to hate her, and if you love her, you dont need to hate me.”

Oprah told Meghan about headlines where she was being compared to Kate, including in stories where Kate was being praised for cradling her baby bump. Oprah said, “You doing the same thing, the headline said, Meghan cant keep her hands off baby bump for pride or vanity.” When Oprah brought up headlines that praised Kate for eating avocados while pregnant and others that linked Meghan’s avocado consumption to water shortages, illegal deforestation, and environmental devastation,” Meghan replied: “Thats a really loaded piece of toast.”

She said she doesn’t know why there was, in Oprah’s words “a standard for Kate” and a different one for her. Meghan added, “I can see now what layers were at play there, and again, they really seem to want a narrative of a hero and a villain.”

Before Meghan’s big Oprah interview, royal reporters Omid Scobie and Carolyn Durand’s 2020 Sussex biography Finding Freedom touched on what Kate and Meghan’s relationship was really like. Meghan and Kate were not feuding, but they never became close.

“Meghan would agree with the assessment that the duchesses were not the best of friends,” the two reporters wrote. “Their relationship hadn’t progressed much since she was Harry’s girlfriend.” Kate didn’t put a lot of effort into becoming close with Meghan, according to Finding Freedom.

Finding Freedom: Harry and Meghan and the Making of a Modern Royal Family

Bookshop.org bookshop.org

$25.75

A source told Scobie and Durand that Kate felt they didn’t have much in common “other than the fact that they lived at Kensington Palace.” That changed when Meghan and Harry moved to Frogmore Cottage in Windsor in 2019, and then to Montecito, California after they officially stepped back from their working senior royal family roles.

The authors wrote that Kate didn’t really give Meghan the level of emotional support the Duchess of Sussex would have liked or needed. For example, Kate sent Meghan flowers for her birthday one year, which was a nice sentiment. But “Meghan would far rather have had Kate check in on her during the most difficult times with the press,” Scobie and Durand wrote. Kate and William ultimately never publicly defended Meghan against British tabloid abuse once Meghan married into the family.

News and Strategy Editor Alyssa Bailey is the news and strategy editor at ELLE.com, where she oversees coverage of celebrities and royals (particularly Meghan Markle and Kate Middleton).
Hilary Weaver is a freelance writer based in New York who writes about politics, queer issues, Meryl Streep, Glenn Close, and every woman the Queen has ever made a dame.

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